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Jay Leno Is Totally Gay For Jessica Biel

July 19, 2008 - Posted by Stephen

Jay Leno is going through a sexual identity crisis. After getting in trouble with the gays for Ryan Phillippe GayFaceGate, it seems as though all the apologies and gay wedding attendances have him worried his flyover state fan base may have lost faith in his man’s man, Harley-riding rep. And in an effort to clean up that potential mess, he’s resorted to eagerly provoking Justin Timberlake into pervy chatter about the improvisational humor-challenged song and dance boy’s girlfriend Jessica Biel. To prove his macho prowess, he leaps suggestively into a tale about meeting Biel on a Jaywalk when she was just 15 or 16, and insists (twice, in fact) that all sorts of very heterosexual thoughts went flooding through his head. As uncomfortable as this clip makes us, Timberlake finds the entire ordeal a (quite literal) thigh-slapper. The pair’s respective desperate attempts at humor and machismo, after the jump.

After hungrily leaning forward in his sweaty seat to probe Justin with those standard women’s magazine questions (”Are you engaged?!” and “Is anyone pregnant?!”), Timberlake does his best to affect charm by avoiding the issues at hand and turning to his well-worn, though never well-received, stand-up act. He’s “engaged” in the conversation! Get it? Yeah, unfortunately, we got it. But it’s Jay’s repeated allusion to meeting the prematurely sexy and underage Biel playing volleyball (insert wink and elbow nudge here) that has us picturing things we never want to ever, ever again. You see, Jay “would still be in jail” had he acted on whatever Dirty Old Man desires he assures both Timberlake and America he most definitely, cross-his-chick-loving-heart, felt at the time. We get it Jay, and no, we still don’t want any part of it.

Wish they would’ve used a different word in the title, but, oh well..

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I’ve seen the clip they’re talking about, it’s on youtube, it was when she was on an audition for Baywatch.

Was it an actual Baywatch audition? I don’t think it was since that was in 1997 and she was already on 7th Heaven. I think it was just Jay Leno doing some kind of parody of it.

Yeah, she was already on 7th Heaven, but it could have been a guest spot she was auditioning for. Maybe it wasn’t, i’m just going by what it said.

That was so badly written and very confused. Jay is not the only one that has problems with their ‘identity. The blurb doesn’t match the title or my efforts to decipher.

Seemed to be saying that Jay was letching after the young Jess. What’s gay about that?

I’ve seen the clip, so i have absolutely idea what being gay has to do with this. This person seems to be a complete idiot who is reaching for, i’m not sure what.

Total waste of my time reading that. Example of when something with her name in it should have been assigned to the rubbish bin. POINTLESS POST.

Just a guess, but they’re probably saying gay because they’re implying Jess looks like a man.

Then let them say it and not attribute it to Jay Leno who was letching after her for her females attribes, not imagined males ones. As i said that was such a mess, you must as you say, be guessing.

But even if that was the case, i’m not clear what it is about her look that is ‘manly’. Toned muscles? Rigorous exercising? Are women are not supposed to be ’strong’ and healthy looking, only soft and fru fru all the time?

This sort of narrow view of what a women is supposed to look and be like, makes me so mad. No wonder women harbour insecurities about how they look all the time.

I love the fact that Jess and Jennifer Garner are not afraid to move away fromt he limpwristed, big breasted, flat rear, air headed image that are constantly thrown out there as the ideal for women. Good for them

PLUS, IF SHE IS ‘MANLY’, THEN AS A FEMALES WHO WOULD LOVE TO HAVE SUCH A GORGEOUS FACE AND BEAUTIFUL BODY LIKE HER’S, ALL I CAN SAY IS , SIGN ME UP FOR WHATEVER SHE HAS A.S.A.P. PLEASE!

I don’t believe either without real proof. They’re both capable of making things up, especially the tabloids. The blogs often feed off of them without checking to see if a story is real or not.

This person was having breakfast so there’s no real reason for them to make it up (even though i know they can). They just seemed to be excited to see a couple of ‘real’ celebs and said so in their blog.

Besides, this person could have be nasty but it’s a fairly harmless sweet piece.

I don’t see why people say that either, but they do, I’ve lost count of how many times people have commented saying she looks like a man.

I think that people are like sheep. Once one person starts saying something, then those that are looking for something to be negative about, will choose that particular thing.

I hadn’t heard it until recently and only by a dedicated few, who as i said are very sheep like. Thinking about it, i think that it’s a compliment to her that people feel so threathened, that they have to make things up.

Plus how do who know that this person wasn’t saying that Jay wanted to be a woman? Equally stupid but hey, the whole thing is a total waste of time. Can’t believe that i gave this so much airing. Too much time on my hands being squandered